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Fuck off FOMO: Why saying "no" will enrich your life outside of the rave

The most important two letter word in the game

  • Funster
  • 7 March 2017
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I personally made a conscious decision not to go and see Ricardo Villalobos at fabric the other weekend. For me, that was a tricky one to say no to. Watching Ricky in that room is an experience you only get a few times a year and it's nothing short of holy. This session was made all the more momentous as it was the first time Villalobos was back to fabric since its re-opening. So basically, I was torn down the middle. Usually I'd just go out even if I was skint, had been out loads already over the last few weeks and was a bit tired – but not this time.

Not going out that night was a blessing in disguise. I woke up the next day feeling energised and refreshed and before midday, which is a rarity on most Sundays. The sleep I had wasn't disjointed and stressful, it was peaceful and wholesome. During the day I exercised, played squash and cooked a meal with my housemates. That scenario is a far cry away from a post 2pm wake-up accompanied by takeaway from down the road while hiding under a duvet till Monday with Friends on repeat.

The latter can sometimes be fun of course but a Sunday that's spent up and about is a pleasant feeling. That cloudiness and weight on Monday is also extinguished, there's no hazy slap in the face when you get to work and your actual output is at least doubled.

This amount of partying is also fucking expensive, it leaves you tired for days (the whole week if you go really hard) and it takes a serious strain on your body. By no means am I saying stop partying – far from it, it's my favourite thing in the world – but choosing your battles and picking the main events, rather than doing everything, is pretty essential for a healthy club life.

And this all stems from a healthy life outside of the club. A few of my colleagues have taken a step back from clubbing every week and it's easy to see that they've benefited from it. They're sharp at work, they actually do stuff at weekends and health wise, they've swapped mid-morning trips to the off licence to get booze during the afters for mid-morning runs and swims.

For me it's been harder – I guess I'm what you could call a "yes" man. I find it difficult to say no, to let people down and to be out of the rave, somewhere I find extremely comfortable to let loose and be an exaggerated version of myself. But I'm finding myself with new leases of life when I stay in at the weekend: I eat better, sleep better and although I may not be prancing around acting like a loveable rogue, I'm happy within myself.

It's easy to go to either extreme but the art of saying "no" is about finding that middle ground. I didn't go to see Ricardo and while I have no doubt he was incredible, it's not the end of the world. He'll be back, as will most of your favourite DJs – they'll play again and you can go wild then. The importance of putting your body/mind/wallet first is key and the results speak for themselves.

FOMO is a temporary feeling whereas losing the plot and control of your bank account can be lasting. Instead of six club visits a month, try three. Instead of twice a week, try once. I'm definitely going to be limiting myself. I party too much but I'm going to find my inner zen and tell FOMO to fuck off. It's a state of mind, not a state of life.

Wish me luck.

Funster is Mixmag's Deputy Digital Editor. He's swapped house for Hygge every weekend

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