How to recover from five days partying at Glastonbury Festival

Ask any seasoned pro and they will tell you that the hardest part of spending five days on Worthy Farm isn't the toilets, the precarious access to showers, the hit-and-miss quality of the food vendors or even - dare I say it - the arduous, close to unbearable journey getting yourself back to the corner of the globe you exist in outside of the Pilton wonderland. No, the hard part comes after – not even just the day after, but the days after that, the week, sometimes even the month.

Chalking up tens of thousands of steps a day in the great outdoors combined with a headfirst dive into all your vices with reckless abandon on minimal sleep, with just one meal a day lining your stomach - it's a recipe for post-Glasto blues: a state of physical and mental exhaustion that creeps up, ever-so-sneakily in the days after you return to real life.

Symptoms generally include feeling like you've been hit by a bus, unexplained blisters, the hearing capabilities of a 90-year-old, sleeping for 10 hours and feeling like you've slept for one, and a general wish that you hadn't immediately downed that tea-temperature Buzzball you found underneath your sleeping bag upon waking up on Sunday.

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Some would say that post-Glasto blues are simply a vehicle for weeding out the Glastonboys from the Glastonmen, while others believe it's a sign that maybe you should change your wicked ways and behave for the rest of the summer. We'd argue that instead, it's simply a karmic payment for putting in a heroic shift and maximising your experience at arguably the world's best music festival.

So what if we told you that you could mitigate it all and still give Glastonbury your all? Whether you're about to experience the delights of this period for the first time or you're finding yourself less capable of bouncing back as in Glastonbury's past, we've compiled a list of tips and tricks to get back on the horse before, during and after the festival.

Get essentials on your packing list

Yes, that glittery cowboy hat and those eight different coloured flares might have been the first thing you added to your Glastonbury kit list, but it's worth taking the time before you go to make sure you have essentials to ensure your body can withstand the task ahead. A decent pair of shoes that can protect your feet from blisters, spare socks and underwear, a quality pillow, sleep mask and a water bottle are by far some of the most important items you can bring along with you — while vitamins, ear plugs, a first-aid kit, blister plasters and other more specialist items will be in short supply once you reach Worthy Farm. While you can always procure yourself a wacky accessory or two from vendors, key health supplies will be basic-at-best — so make sure you have everything you'll need to keep your energy levels high.

Fuel up

While it may be tempting to resort to rabbit food in preparation of your forthcoming festival sinning, eating protein and carbohydrate-rich foods before this verified endurance test will give you the best shot at keeping your energy levels consistent and avoiding a crash while on the farm.

Tie up loose ends

The last thing you want to face on that dreaded Monday slog back home is that email you've been avoiding, that appointment you thought you'd cancelled, the package you were supposed to return and forgot — so make a list of everything that will need to be done until at least the end of the week on your return, and try to tick off as much as you can beforehand. 

Don't ignore stomach growls

It happens to us all, we're zipping around the site trying to manoeuvre the eye-watering clashes to make sure we see all of our favourite music and suddenly a keening, unholy noise begins emitting from your tummy — but, we're not hungry. The sunshine combined with alcohol might make you believe that you don't really need a dinner time, but this is your body crying out to you for sustenance so you can continue having fun. When it comes to food at Glastonbury its best to see it as a much-needed opportunity to fuel up; if you're putting vitamins at the centre, tips like taking along Huel to the site - as recommended by our guide to maximising your five days raving at Glastonbury - will give you everything you need without queuing up at a burger stand and losing your mates. Though if you do need to go get some food, think about what your body needs — while you're craving chips and a can of coke, rich carbohydrates like pasta, noodles and rice with some additional protein will allow you to keep going for longer.

Take your vitamins and minerals

We're not exactly going to recommend taking along your entire medicine cabinet, but vitamin-based essentials will ensure you have a fighting chance to stave off the exhaustion when you return; think magnesium to keep your muscles in tip-top shape, electrolytes for hydration, vitamin C to support your immune system, B vitamins for energy, and melatonin to give you a good night's rest.

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Sit down meet-ups

We're all excited to dance with our mates on the farm, right? Though with a busy schedule, you might find yourself aching quicker than you thought during your time at Glastonbury. A great way to get a much-needed rest during your time at the festival is arranging sit-down meet-ups with your friends, so you can get off your weary legs and actually have a conversation instead of shouting at each other over the soundsystem.

Remember to wear earplugs

While there are hundreds of stages at Glastonbury, there are even more soundsystems, and as they assault your ears for five days straight, you will most certainly regret not wearing earplugs once you arrive back home. There's nothing much more uncomfortable than having your ears ring for days after a festival, which not only makes recovery that much longer, but also places you at serious risk of developing long-term hearing problems. Ensuring you have a decent pair of earplugs, plus a spare, is essential — if you forget or lose yours, though, do not worry. Glastonbury's various help and welfare desks typically carry earplugs, while festival's official earplug partner Loop will be giving punters the opportunity to pick some up on site.

Get your wash on before anything else 

While we all wish Glastonbury was real life, and we'd like to bring a little slice of Worthy Farm back with us — your home smelling like it isn't one of them. Chucking all your things in the wash and ensuring any muddy shoes are outside ready to be cleaned when you drag yourself out of your duvet, a £40 takeaway and Simpsons marathon will make everything much easier.

Be tactical with your Post-Glasto feed

Don't worry. We're not going to tell you to forgo your favourite fast food option after that Monday trip home. But considering your body has just gone through the wringer think about the kinds of foods that will help get your body back into its normal rhythm. A big old chocolate milkshake might seem like a guilty pleasure but it typically is full of carbohydrates, protein, and electrolytes — all things you'll need to get your body back on track.

Sweat it out

There are surefire ways to expel the five-day festi toxins from your body, and while you might think you need to avoid alcohol for maybe the rest of your life after your heroic Glastonbury stint, consider some cheat code ways to refresh and renew. Getting yourself down to your local sauna will give you a jump-start at recovery, while a hot bath with muscle-relaxing salts will provide the additional benefit of loosening your muscles and quickening up your recovery. And, if you're that way inclined, you could go on a big run or sweat it out in the gym... rather you than us, though.

Give everything a stretch

You've put in the work, so like after any strenuous activity the best way to unlock those stiff limbs and do away with camping-bed-induced back aches is a good old-fashioned stretch; you might feel too tired to undertake anything too high-impact, but yoga and pilates exercises can help your muscles loosen up and even help encourage a solid night's sleep. There are even YouTube routines specifically designed to help your body recover from a festival, which focus on your feet, ankles, hips, back and neck.

Sleep is key

One of the most common features of post-Glasto blues is a completely out-of-whack body clock; as your body tries to recuperate its lost hours, you might find yourself sleeping for far longer than you would usually need — or less than you thought, with some people even being forced to deal with the dreaded sleep paralysis. Apps like Sleep Cycle, Calm, Headspace and Better Sleep can help you monitor how much rest you're getting, which will help maintain a healthy sleep schedule while creating a relaxing sleep space and avoiding caffeine, large meals and alcohol can improve your sleep quality and decrease the likelihood of sleep paralysis. 

Take it slow

Not sure if we've mentioned already, but you're going to be absolutely knackered post-Glastonbury, and for a couple of days, you might need to lower your expectations of what you expect to achieve. Though for some people, one huge exorcism sleep might ensure they wake up a new person, for others, getting back to normal might take a couple of days. Understanding your limitations is a must as your body and mind recover, so be patient and slowly ease yourself back into life, work, chores and socialising rather than burning the candle at both ends.

Plan wholesome activities 

It can be tempting to avoid all social activities after Glastonbury, telling yourself that you need to make up for days spent having fun with your pals on the farm. However, as your body and - more importantly - your brain - recover, spending time with your pals will be essential. If you don't want to spend time in the pub, plan a day out to a gallery or a park. Get yourself out of the house and around your people, and real life will feel just as fun as the festival.

Megan Townsend is Mixmag's Deputy Editor, follow her on Twitter